Being the Faithful Account of a TLA Conference Attendee, Part IV (Amanda)

Thursday, April 2 (cont.)

So 3:25 arrives and this time we both duck out, sadly leaving behind the Librarian in Black and the last 20 minutes of her presentation. We find the Green Room and meet the lovely people from Highsmith and the school librarian who won the other award that Highsmith is giving out at this Conference. We are instructed in how to proceed, but one essential element is left out (as you’ll soon discover). A couple of minutes before we are to leave to Green Room and line up, the speaker for General Session II arrives. I am just feet away from Gloria Steinem. It’s the closest I’ve ever been to a genuinely famous person. She seems very gracious as bigwigs from TLA and the Texas State Library jockey for position to meet her. The stage manager motions us outside. The Reagan Administration pizza lurches but stays down.

When they announce our names, I walk up the steps to the stage and start praying fervently that my heel doesn’t catch in anything. I don’t even look back to see if Melody is having to struggle against the jet stream my rapid progress across the stage is causing. I shake the Highsmith rep’s hand and accept the award and $1,000 check on behalf of the library. I then stare like a deer in the headlights at the humongous crowd before me, painfully aware that every pore on my face is now prominently displayed on two large screen monitors behind me. My brain shuts down at this point, and when they take the photo of us, I am still clutching the award plaque to my body like it is a life preserver and I am adrift in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. No way does the thought occur to me that it might be a spiffy idea for Melody to hold the plaque with me for the photo op (hence, the missing element from the stage manager’s instructions). I manage to make it off the stage without any further incidents. In retrospect, I suppose that looking like an idiot for not sharing the plaque with my colleague in the official TLA photo is vastly preferable to finding out later that I walked across the stage in front of thousands of people with my skirt rucked up in my pantyhose or something. It could have been worse, so I’ll take my blessings wherever I can.

One really, really cool aspect of being an award winner is that Melody and I get to sit in the front row for Gloria Steinem’s speech. Thankfully for my fragile ego at this point, she doesn’t employ Paula Poundstone’s tactics and pick on people in her line of sight. Instead, I think she actually smiles at me a couple of times. She is, after all, the only person in the auditorium at this point who didn’t see me make a goofball out of myself, as she was still in the Green Room when I was selfishly hogging the Highsmith award. The talk she gives is inspiring and enjoyable, and she is very lovely to everyone who comes up to ask her a question on the mike afterwards—even the poor soul who addresses her as “Ms. Stein.” (WOO-HOO! I am no longer the number one dolt for the afternoon!!!)

After the end of General Session II, Gloria is whisked off to sign books in front of the auditorium. We are taken back to the Green Room for additional photos. This time I allow Melody to lay her hands on the plaque as well. I do learn from my mistakes every so often.

Since my schedule for Friday is mostly unit meetings, I won’t bore you with the details. I will say that I had a great time at Conference and brought back a lot of cool ideas that we might try on for size at APL. And that really is the purpose of this yearly event. To interact with library staff from all over the state of Texas and steal—I mean, appropriate—their stuff to use for your own library. Most of the handouts from the Conference will be available here. Be sure to check back in a few days as well, as some aren’t posted until a couple of weeks after the Conference when the TLA staff has had time to recover.

One final footnote: while waiting at Houston Hobby for our plane to Dallas, Melody and I are selected for one of those wonderful pat-downs the Transportation Security Administration staff does at random. In plain view of everyone who will be on our plane, we are led over to the side of the boarding station and asked to “spread-em.” Really, really embarrassing. However, my attitude about the experience does a complete 180 when I find out that Melody and I (and the three other people who were also pulled aside for this “special attention”) get to board the plane right after the Business Select passengers. Definitely some benefits to being singled out for this procedure…Note to self: in the future, look shifty when at the airport—it nets you a great window seat!